Satisfied in Singleness?

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Blogger Debbie McDowell may have more stamps in her passport than anyone I know. This South Carolina resident loves the world, the people in it and especially the Father, who created it all. Hear her unique perspective on His strength working within her daily weaknesses




When I am most satisfied in Jesus that is when I am most satisfied in singleness.


This is a growing realization in my life. Let me introduce myself – I am a 54 year old never-married single. This may immediately help you begin to get the picture of why I’m so saddened by singles who miss the fullness of life.


According to the 2011 estimates, in the US population 15 years and over, 48.3% are married. All of the other categories are single – widowed – 6%, Divorced – 11%, Separated – 2.2%, Never married – 32.5%.


The beauty of singleness from a Biblical perspective is described in 1 Corinthians 7. Being single is a calling to focus on pleasing God with our entire being. It is not an excuse to live in selfishness and sadness, in bitterness and fear, in always searching for ways to impress the opposite sex.


I usually say that 90-95% of the time I love being single and find satisfaction and strength first of all in Jesus. The remaining 5-10% of the time when I want to be married is usually at holidays, when my car breaks down, when I need a hug, want a conversation with a male – times when I am seeking my satisfaction in things or people other than Jesus.


I do experience weakness and discontent. At those times, I:


call someone that I have not talked to in a long time,

go out with a friend to do something special,

do something for someone else,

go for a walk or run,


listen to praise and worship music,

reflect on the blessings of singleness,  

refer to my favorite Scriptures on note cards. 

In these moments of weakness, grief and loneliness, the Scriptures give me strength.  An ongoing anchor from His word for me is John 3:30 – He must increase.  I must decrease


Sure I have gone through the 20s and 30s where people tried harder to get me married than they do now. Maybe they have given up. Maybe they have seen the joy, strength and peace of my relationship with Jesus. I hope it is the second one.


One small pet peeve – If you say without thinking, “when she (he) gets married ………………..” please think about that before you say it again and recognize that maybe it should be something like “if God’s plan for her life includes marriage, then……” Some are called by God to life-long singleness and others to be fulfilled in their current calling to singleness.


When I am most satisfied in Jesus that is when I am most satisfied in singleness. And I think this works for marriage too – when you are most satisfied in Jesus you are most satisfied in marriage. Let’s all as brothers and sisters in Christ, enjoy the gift of abundant life and strength in Him.




More Posts as you Seek Him as your Satisfaction:


A Special Dialog with the Shepherd


Spiritual Eyes and Attraction


A Glimpse of Brilliance