Holy Father,
My motivation in wanting to know You isn’t always from pure intention. I want increase, not decrease — joy, not pain — strength, not weakness. Your comforting joy attracts me, but I’m hesitant to explore Your grieving sorrow.
Yet, You are more than a good-timing God. You are both Christmas and Easter. Fellowship with You necessitates both resurrection and death, gladness and tears (Philippians 3:10). You call us to follow whether You lead beside still waters or into death’s valleys (Psalm 23).
On my part, I desire a shortcut, not a meandering pathway. I like Your staff of wonder, but I despise the crisis’s rod. I want You to praise my progress, console my stumbling, and dote on my every emotion. The moment I sense Your silence, I despair, proving the source of my motive is self rather than spirit.
Fenelon said, “Privations are meat for men; by them, the soul is rendered hardy.” How little joy I have when encountering trials (James 1:2). I prefer You to perfect me supernaturally so that I’m spared conformation to Your death (Philippians 3:10). I have yet to see the value of endurance as You do, for my ways are not like Yours (Isaiah 55:11).
And so, I bend the knee of my will again today (Philippians 2:10). I ask for power and might, realizing that You grant them most freely when used for steadfastness (Colossians 1:11). Download Your Mind into mine that I may repeat Your thoughts back to You in prayer that works. Thank You for listening. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.