On the Street Where I Live

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I wanted to share with you a picture of my town

 

No, I didn’t use Instagram or some cool filter on my lens. We’d had one of those dust bowl days with wind gusts up to 35 miles an hour. 

 

And it really irked me. 

 

Something about seeing air – that is supposed to be transparent – kinda does me in.

 

Honestly, I was in a bad mood all day

 

So, when I sat down to write this blog, I realized that I needed to “confess my sin one to another”.

 

I felt mean.

 

Now that I think about it, the Father had warned me about this. Today’s quiet-time journal entry began with the words:

 

“Living an inside-out life: my inside should be influencing my outside, not the other way around.”

 

Wow.

 

I had heard it and even written it down, but didn’t manage to live it. 

 

I was disgusted by the gusty dust and it was late in the day before I managed to see the Wind of the Spirit instead. 

 

 

Holy Father,

 

I’ve confessed my sin to others – now I want to confess it to You. As You well know, I had quite the attitude and I didn’t live the inside-out life that we talked about earlier. I hate feeling this way and am embarrassed that I can still let simple inconveniences drag me toward the flesh. Sigh. 

 

Thanks for not only being greater than those in the world, but also for being greater than my own condemning heart. I need that. Thank You for already forgiving me of both my sin and my resulting guilt. Now let me get over it as quickly as You have.

 

Although everything is already subject to You (and that everything must also include my attitude) – we don’t yet get to see it as fully realized. I still have days like this, when I end up groaning within myself. On those days, I’m just ready to arrive at the day when my outside life will be swallowed up with Your inside Life. I am ready to see the transformation evidenced as clearly as You already do

 

But until then, I keep pressing forward while sometimes falling backward. I continue living the duality of joyfully agreeing with You and disappointedly tripping on my own fleshliness. I really appreicate the fact that You don’t condemn me for this. That gives me great hope

 

And if I hope for what I can’t see yet, then it really gives me something to look forward to. Thank You for Your Presence. Now, let’s get back to that inside-out life….

 

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