My mother was a quiet individual, only comfortable with lifetime friends. While others flew off the handle, Mother kept her peace. But when she wanted to make a point, she could – by a poignant one-on-one discussion. I experienced many of those conversations, for she had a higher value on who I would be than who I was.
On the day of the Kool-Aid incident, I knew I’d crossed a line. Even a five-year-old knows some things instinctively. When Mother said, “Go apologize to the grocer,” I knew she meant it.
Minutes earlier, she and I were shopping in a tiny country store, gathering items we hadn’t butchered or grown ourselves. Eggs and butter remained on our list, as we no longer raised chickens and never kept milk cows. We bought loaf bread and Brer Rabbit molasses for my daddy, and, once in a blue moon, Mother indulged me in an orange push-up pop from the frozen food section.
This was not one of those days.
With popsicles off the table, I began scanning the eye-level shelves of Dickinson’s Grocery. I set my sights on a packet of grape drink mix on the beverage aisle. Preschoolers from time immemorial have coveted goods in the market, and, especially on this day, I proved no different.
Not surprisingly, Mother denied my initial ten-cent request. In my family, this always meant “closed for discussion.” Nevertheless, I continued to stare into the cartoon face of the cheerful purple pitcher on display.
Since only three of us were in the four-aisle store, a glance told me no one was watching. Mother and Mr. Tex were busy with check-out. My A-line dress had pockets, so I slipped the flat drink envelope onto my person with my heart pounding.
When I settled beside my mother in the front seat (in an age before car seats), my preschool acumen faultily told me the coast was clear. Pulling the packet out of my pocket, I quietly sat it in my lap, dreaming about enjoying the delicious flavor with the Kool-Aid Kid at home.
Things went differently than planned. The next thing I knew, I was out of our Chevrolet, facing the grocery’s screened door. In my terror, I turned back toward the car where Mother remained. But, without mouthing a word, my mother flicked her index finger toward the entrance, indicating I would go in.
To this day, I vividly remember Mr. Dickinson’s face towering above the imposing, wooden counter. With tears streaming down my face, I produced the evidence, stammering, “I took this, and I’m sorry.” I learned the importance of truthfulness and trustworthiness that day by living it.
Like my mother, God is not a harsh parent. Although He often seems quiet, our Father loves one-on-one conversations with us. God wants our relationship so that He allows learning experiences in our physical world to help us grow more like Him.
When we call upon Him amid challenging circumstances, His answer isn’t always what we expect. We assume the best solution is a resolution to return to everyday comfort. He desires to join us in our messiness to do life together.
Listen to His heart. “(You) will call upon Me, and I will answer (you); I will be with (you) in trouble” (Psalm 91:15). We want out of the trouble. He wants to accompany us through it. We want to eliminate the stress, while He wants the pressure to mold us into His image.
I never desire the eternal when I’m satisfied with the temporal. Although I see the value of God’s spiritual law, there is still much of this world in my eyes (Romans 7:14). Only when my physical situation becomes upsetting do I look beyond myself for relief.
A mother eagle rids her nest of soft, down feathers and exposes the thorny base to encourage her eaglets to fly. As the comfort of the nest diminishes, their desire for the air increases. Like the mother eagle, our Heavenly Father often must lessen the warmth of our nest before we are willing to take flight with Him.
One day, we will live forever in the Presence of His glory. In preparation, God gradually transforms us by increasing our agitation in this world and our anticipation toward the next. Drawing our hearts upward, He replaces our appetite for the temporal with that which is eternal. May we become more accustomed to Kingdom life than to the existence of this world, and more thirsty for Living Water than for Kool-Aid.
“Fully embrace God’s correction as part of your training, for He is doing what any loving father does for his children…God corrects us throughout our lives for our good, giving us an invitation to share His Holiness. Now all disciple seems to be more pain than pleasure at the time, yet later it will produce a transformation of character, bringing a harvest of righteousness and peace to those who yield to it” (Hebrews 12:7, 10-11 The Passion Translation).
Even so, Lord Jesus, come.
Comments 2
That almost made me cry as I pictured little girl Kandy on that day. But Mother was right and the impression on your child’s heart that day instructs us even now. A very good word here! ????
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I saw your post with cute Annette pictures. Time does fly, doesn’t it? Thank you for your kind words. Love you!